Speaking to Death
My wife and I waited in a line that snaked down the church steps. We were there to pay our respects to the family of a friend. The funeral […]
A Bunker in the Sky
We took our Thanksgiving break with my wife’s family in Gulf Shores this year, where my in-laws own a condo. It was a large group and two more condos […]
Vacation Truth
When I go on vacation I always tell myself this will be the time when I get my life together, even if only for a short while. Somehow, […]
The Graduate
(I wrote this last week prior to my son’s graduation.) I was sitting on the front steps of my parent’s house. My best friend was there as […]
We’ve got serious personality
Last night my family started taking a personality test around the dinner table. The wife had found some website that would ask you about ten questions and then tell you […]
Scars
When I was seven I had surgery on my right arm for a bone marrow infection. The scar looked like the doctors were not as worried about the cut as […]
Middle Age Malaise
A few days ago I got in the shower and accidentally water-boarded myself. I mean it. I was so tired I stood in front of the shower head with my […]
Nostalgia is a Bitch, Y’all
I was standing in my living room with my mother. Two eight year olds were battling with Lightsabers around our knees. Since I wasn’t wearing a protective cup at the […]
Swimming with the fish(s)
“Dad, look what we won! Look what we won!” My twins were racing through the school, ducking around other parents and students. It was carnival night and I felt like […]
Driving Mister Dowdy
My oldest son has his driver’s license. When I think about my behavior once I was granted that responsibility, it scares the hell out of me. But, so far, this […]
Forrest Gump: Guard Dog and “Man” Dog
What were you doing at 4 a.m. this morning? I get up early for work, but not that early. I was up at 4 a.m. this morning because of our […]
Good bye baseball, hello soccer…
We said good bye to baseball last night, with a loss where our bats, our pitching and our fielding all went to pot. For the sake of my 12 […]
Life’s Normal Road Trips
They might be whining like their bladders are about to explode, but they’re really just bored, or hungry, and they know I’m not stopping for anything short of a national emergency, so they wait until a rest area is out of reach, then lie about having to go to the bathroom so they can rape and pillage the candy aisle in some 7/11.
Standing at the Edge of Something Huge
Opening the car’s hood was an exercise in futility, unless a leprechaun was going to pop out and tell me how to fix a broken transmission. I looked over my […]
A Washington Fix
I could see yellow sweat pants as she leaned in the side door of a minivan ten years older than my own. A mop of gray hair was mashed […]
42 things I will teach my teenage boys…
1. You have a penis. It comes with responsibilities. 2. Girls have vaginas. If you’re not careful, you can create responsibilities. 3. I don’t care who you love, […]
